EVERYBODY HATES TIFFANY

Remember the unattractive and socially lugnut girl from 6th grade that was too stupid to know she wasn’t cool – so she spoke and acted like she was the coolest kid ever? And everybody hated her and thought she was a total lugnut?

She was on my plane from Atlanta on Saturday.

Her name was Tiffany, She’s 12 and made sure we all knew.

Everyone hated Tiffany. The crew hated her. They hated her before we even took off. She demanded people shift seats because she “can’t look out the window. ”

Tiffany abandoned her seat and took over an entire empty row in the “Economy Plus” seats that those of us stuffed into the rear of the plane were not allowed to sit in because we had not paid the $35 for an extra 5-inches of leg

Tiffany than began to play with all the items over her seat – the blowers, the lights, the attendant button.

Dear God…the attendant button.

ON…off. ONNNNNN…Off. ON-off.

She rang to find out what time it was.

She rang to have someone find her bag.

She rang because no one stopped her.

We all agreed. If we crashed Rebecca would be eaten first.

In fact, we decided to go ahead and kill her and eat her anyway. Even thou it was only 60 minutes to NewBern ……. no one would blame us.

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One Comment Add yours

  1. I would throw her off the plane…at 30,000 feet!

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